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Daddy-J
on September 11
Saturday 09.15.01
What
a week! What a world. I am grateful to be alive and so full of sorrow
for those who are suffering. NYC is the place of my birth and to see
the decimation of such grand buildings, to know the horrors of the attack,
to have actually witnessed the second plane hit while I was preparing
to go to work Tuesday morning, is overwhelming. Once I realized what
I was seeing was real and not some awful dream or movie.. it still took
30 minutes for it to dawn on me, there might be passengers on those
planes.
Working in communications as I do, I jumped into my car and headed directly
to work, along the way hearing now about the Pentagon. I remembered
the day of Oklahoma City and while I needed to know what in the world
(literally), was going on... I found myself Listening to the TV and
only turning my head to view if there was new data or images. My Lord!
The buildings collapsed and disappeared. How could that happen?!? What
weird twisted agony and imagery was this, assaulting our senses and
even our understanding of reality?
It is Saturday now. I have spoken to my children and eased their minds,
I hung the flag up in front of the house yesterday and also a large
on on the wall of my soon to be vacated office at the studio. I cried
when I saw a broadcast from Britain of people there playing the United
States National Anthem, waving our flags and shedding tears for us.
I joined with coworkers for a few moments of prayer yesterday at noon.
I lit a candle last night at 7 PM.
I worry and pray for my brother a retired cop who's beat used to be
in Brooklyn and who may have lost many friends on the force. I worry
and pray for my dear friend a recently ordained Minister who lives in
the lower Manhattan below 14th Street. May she be well and have strength
in this incredibly burdened time.
Yes I grew up in the wake of W.W.II and Pearl Harbor and lived through
Viet Nam and studied the Holocaust when those films with the awful images
of death from the concentration camps were released. My dad landed at
Normandy in World War Two, My sister and my future brother in law served
in Viet Nam. I was home from school and watched the day Kennedy was
shot and Cronkite cried on the air . I worked making F-14's at Grumman
Aircraft in the early 70's and protested the War on the weekends. So
I hung my flags.
But even in the wake of these things, the instant horror of so much
carnage, so much evil intent, so much madness seemingly unprovoked,
seems at times almost too much to bear. The world is a different place
today then it ever was before.
So God and I have had a lot of talks lately, and while I am sure there
is some purpose for this seeming insanity that is beyond my vision...
still I ache. I'm not one of those outwardly religious types. I keep
my commitment to raise my children in a Christian way and I often share
the idea of spiritual guidance and reaching for the Creator when I encounter
those who are ready to listen. Beyond that my spiritual path is a very
private and personal journey.
While I may not watch every frame of video any more in my life, I don't
bury my head in the sand either. I'll donate blood in a week when the
supplies start to dwindle. They like my "O negative" down
at the blood bank. I'll calm my children and those around me and work
to gain whatever normalcy I can in this craziness. I'll work to find
work, to provide for myself and my children. And I'll pray for you..
my reader, my fellow planet inhabitant. If we all ask for the best for
our world and each other, if we dig down deep and find the strength
to be our best..if we all continue to strive to leave this place better
then we found it... maybe the pain can subside. They say time heals
all wounds. I'm not convinced that I have that much time left here but
I am sure this wound will leave a deep scar on our world that will never
disappear. I worry and pray for my world, it's leaders, the victims,
and even those who perpetrated this unspeakable darkness up on us all.
I do that because it is all know to do. Until the hate is healed, the
threats are never really gone. God Bless you. God Bless America.
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